CASE REF PL/115 · SEASONS 2009–2018
The league says the books were out by more than £900m. Here’s £900m. Show us how it’s done.
SPEND £900M.
BEAT NINE CHAMPIONS.
Eleven random squads. Sign players at what they cost then. Beat the nine champions.
EXHIBIT 01
Open the books
£900M. Eleven turns, each dealing a random squad from 2009–2018.
EXHIBIT 02
Buy before the price explodes
Prices are that season's. A 2012 De Bruyne costs a fraction.
EXHIBIT 03
Face the nine champions
Every title winner of the period. Go 9-0-0. Then the Commission rules.
The docket
Nine fixtures, one per season, in order.
- M1Chelsea2009-10
- M2Manchester United2010-11
- M3Manchester City2011-12
- M4Manchester United2012-13
- M5Manchester City2013-14
- M6Chelsea2014-15
- M7Leicester City2015-16
- M8Chelsea2016-17
- M9Manchester City2017-18
Meanwhile, in reality
On 29 September 2026 a commission found Manchester City in breach of Premier League financial rules from 2009-10 to 2017-18. The club denies wrongdoing and says it will appeal.
This site is a parody game. Everything that happens inside it, including verdicts, is fiction.
Eleven vacancies. £900M. No questions asked — yet.